If it walks like a chicken…
Every weekend Teddy and I go grocery shopping. An odd bonding experience, I’ll admit. He insists that he accompanies me so that I am reminded to buy him the necessary items to survive the coming week. I like to think he enjoys my company. Either way, it’s always an adventure.
One day, we were passing the meat section. He stopped, tilted his head, then said in a rather monotone voice, “Mom, there is an entire raw chicken wedged under that freezer.” I stopped and looked at his extended hand, pointing to the putrifying poultry. Acknowledging his disgusting discovery we wheeled onward. It was pretty gross, but we had a good laugh and related the experience to the unenlightened individuals who stayed home while we hunted and gathered under flourescent lights.
The following weekend we repeated this strange ritual called shopping. “I wonder”, he said, “if that chicken will still be there?” I hoped not. With a mixture of dread and gaiety we approached the freezer. “It’s there!” he exclaimed. Oh goody. Of all the things that one could look forward to, our attention was focused on this rotting chicken. I threatened to tell an employee about this disturbing phenomenon. Teddy begged me not to say anything.
It became a game. Week after week we looked for the offensive bird and were always rewarded with its presence. I began to wonder if it really was a chicken. Afterall, wouldn’t it stink or decompose or something? Teddy assured me that it was indeed a chicken. He even knelt down to get a better look. Yup, he confirmed, it’s a chicken.
Finally I could stand it no longer. A nice employee asked me if we were finding everything we needed. “Yes”, I replied, “and then some. I have to tell you”, I laughed, “that there is a dead chicken wedged under this freezer up ahead.” She followed us to the crime scene and then she started laughing. She informed us that the doppelganger was insulating foam. “Sure looks like a chicken to me” I laughed again. I told her that knowledge made my shopping experience a whole lot easier, but it may have ruined it for my son. We all chuckled over that one, except for Teddy who still was not certain that the employee had spoken the truth.
We still shop every weekend. And we pass the inanimate insulating foam. Well, it still looks like a chicken to me…
on March 5th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
HA! That’s just so hilarious!! I am sure Teddy was very disappointed and can just see him looking forward to see if the “chicken” was still going to be there and then questioning if the employee was really telling the truth or not! What a riot! I tell ya, it’s never a dull day with kids around is it?!